IMPORTANT SITE NEWS – PAID MEMBERSHIPS REQUIRED EFFECTIVE 5/1/08
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Cost and Incentives |
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| REPUBLICAN FAITH GOLD*Here’s the best of both worlds:
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$585 + $95 app. fee* (save $50)· Member benefits PLUS· Deeper, more insightful discussions· Access to special images
· Banning abilities · Access to our PSRODT® software package. |
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REPUBLICAN FAITH SILVER* Get the critical/important benefits, resources and networking opportunities you need to manage your salvation with 200 COMMENTS, 5 Individual BLOG POSTS per month and downloadable prayer by Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett suitable for framing on acid free paper. ($365 + $95 application fee). |
$365 + $95 app. fee*· General Member benefits· Discounts on T-shirts, personalized prayer requests, · Member Only Rebuking 101 online Seminar. | Join online |
| REPUBLICAN FAITH GENERAL*Advance your chances for ETERNAL SALVATION by seeking certification as a RF RECOGNIZED CHRISTIAN through REPUBLICAN FAITH. 150 COMMENTS PER MONTH and a CERTIFICATE OF PRAYER suitable for framing. It’s the premier membership program for Conservative Christians. ($275 + $95 application fee). |
$275 + $95 app fee*· Pursue Conservative Christian Fellowship online. | Join online |
Uniformed Services* Active-duty members of the Army, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard and Commissioned Corps of the Public Health Service can benefit from participating in both REPUBLICAN FAITH. 100 COMMENTS per month! And if you join TODAY you will receive a special prayer ($285). |
$285 + fee*· Special rate for Military Members. · FREE LIMITED EDITION “I Support The Troops More Than You Do” Yellow Ribbon Magnets | Online join – not available Print an application |
| Full-time student*Get your career started early using the resources and networking that both REPUBLICAN FAITH offers. Allows 65 COMMENTS per month and a PERSONALIZED PRAYER each semester during FINALS! You must be a full-time student as defined by the guidelines of your college or university in good-standing with a 2.5 GPA or higher. You must provide an Official Transcript. w/ notarized school stamp. ($65). |
$65**· Special rate for REPUBLICAN FAITH students. · FREE “Christian Students know more than you! ” BUMPER STICKER | Online join – not available Print an application |
| Christian or Home-School Teachers*Stay current, network and benefit from membership in REPUBLICAN FAITH. Allows 65 COMMENTS and If you are a faculty member teaching theology or Conservative Politics in an accredited college or university, a CERTIFICATION OF EXCELLANCE for your classroom – suitable for framing. Annual price for this very special membership category is nominal. ($105). |
$105**· Special rate for REPUBLICAN FAITH Christian Educators.· FREE “Christian Teachers and Home School Teachers Teach More Better” BUMPER STICKER | Online join – not available Print application |
anonymous said
STFU and SYUT
Moderater note: Careful what you wish for hon if JUNE GORDON is hyped up on her junk she’ll do it! THAT is a FACT.
Josh said
i think this whole website is a joke. None of the people commenting on here really exist.
Warrior Jodie said
TAFFY I done paid YOU $250 for MY HALF of that blame web site and you AINT getting another dime outta me. Georges RETARD daughter caught peunominia and it just cost me an extra $500 this month! If she dont die soon or every body dont stop nickel diming me to death I am slap GOIN OFF on some bodys A$$. CAPRIS?
Brother Bear said
Dearest Josh:
I don’t exist? Hmmm, then who is that looking at me in the mirror?
Anywho, a paid membership is a great idea! I’ll have to get a couple for the men of my All Male Bible Reading group.
Praise Jesus for whom America wouldn’t survive without!
YIC
-bb
Moderater note: WELCOME BACK BROTHER BEAR!
Warrior Jodie said
JOSH
For ever thing you say I
Understand be
Casuse you are crazy and need a
Kick in
Your ass.
Other than that you are just
Useless to me and ever body else.
CM Qurck said
poor april fools attempt, next time, use real emails for the sign up address and no ytmnd pages.
3/10
This message was created automatically by mail delivery software.
A message that you sent could not be delivered to one or more of its recipients. This is a permanent error. The following address(es) failed:
iwannajoin@letmein.com
SMTP error from remote mailer after RCPT TO::
Anonymous said
tee hee cmqurk clicked teh send
/b/ tard were gonna join
>lulz how old ur 10?
Sister Mabel Gargula said
Oh, I’m not sure that I like this idea. It seems like any cretin with enough money could become a moderator! I can’t imagine what kind of trash we’re going to get.
Sister Mabel Gargula said
Mrs. Gaines-Crockett, I just left you a message in the Members Only forum (Yay! I remembered how to get in!). I really urge you to reconsider this idea. These “Anonymous” kids could all pool their money from their paper routes, borrow some money from their parents or whomever, and get a Gold Membership (might I suggest, if you do go forward with this plan to call it a God Membership?) and completely Linus this place.
Brother WhoDat Glory Pines Ministry said
Gee, this sounds like a fantastic idea. Heavens knows that LIEberal DEMONcrats are all on wellfare and food stamps so they could never afford to get a gold membership.
PTL!!
Brother WhoDat Glory Pines Ministry said
Hmmmm?? Something funny happened, the computer went wack-a-doodle, the usual photo of myself giving the blessing at the Annual Republican Baptist Prayer Barbeque and Cage Match Wrestling Event is gone and something else is there, not sure what it is or says, so I guess it doesn’t matter much. Heavens, computers are hormonal, silly, and basically pointless, kinda like females. LOL!!!!
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett said
Dear Brother Bear, WhoDat and Mabel,
Your continued support means so much more than you will ever know. However, we should not worry ourselves about the wrong sort ever achieving anything higher than a RFG membership. Remember dears, we will run security background checks and DNA typing as part of the application fee.
Nothing but the best for my Saints, Praise!
Jodie,
Check your PM inbox before you go spouting off nonsense.
William the Evil American of Scottish ancestry K said
Well if I am going to pay that much there had better be daily midget porn!
And my guess is, There isn’t going to be any.
So
Yours in Nokia’s name
William
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett said
Dear William,
I have no doubt in my mind that Sister Warrior Jodie would work out a “payment” plan with you if money is an issue. She just buried what I believe to be her 5th husband and inherited a small fortune.
We look after our own around here.
William the Evil American of Scottish ancestry K said
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett,
Thank you for your concern for my financial state, it proves you are as kind as you are sexy (totally Christian of course). Offering up Jodie like that….tugged right at my heart strings.
Amount of money isn’t the problem….
Being Scottish-American I have a genetic disposition to get the most “Bang” for the buck…..
and with this “new site” I see a lot of bucks….But no “Bang”..get the picture….of course you do.
Now if you could promise live streams and nightly cams of Warrior Jodie in all of her “glory” (nun habits a major + in my book )especially a lot of WJ on G action… I would be willing to buy a double Republican Faith Gold membership.
your’s in Lee Enfield’s name
William
h8creator said
I am looking forward to moderating this site.
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett said
I bet you do, H8creator. I wouldn’t get too excited just yet, dear, the DNA tests have yet to be returned from the lab. Don’t call me, I’ll call you.
William the Evil American of Scottish ancestry K said
Well Crockett
Are you going to offer up Warrior Jodie in a Nun’s habit doin’ her thang?!? by bank account awaits…….
In Sam Colt’s name
William
Brother WhoDat Glory Pines Ministry said
Dearest Mrs Gaines-Crockett,
Well OBVIOUSLY I will be getting a Gold membership, and one for the wife as well, even though I don’t really allow her on the computer, Lord knows what horrors that silly woman would stumble into on the internets. I just have to ask, is the $585.00 a weekly or monthly fee, I need to get the payment schedule set up with our jewish banker fella? And can we drop it to $575 each since we are paying for two of them, kind of a group discount thing? With the economy so tight these days I reckon it is best to save everywhere you can.
God Bless!
SUMMER said
WHEN U R READING THIS DONT STOP OR SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN MY NAME IS SUMMER I AM 15 YEARS OLD i have BLONDE HAIR , SCARS no NOSE OR EARS I AM DEAD IF U DONT COPY THIS JUS LIKE FROM THE RING COPY N POST THIS ON 5 MORE SITES OR I WILL APPEAR ONE CREEPY NIGHT WEN UR NOT ExPECTING IT BY YOUR BED WITH A NIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SUMMET ING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U IF YOU POST THIS ON 5 MORE FLASH BOXES
Moderator Maude says: Is a Flash Box anything like a Jack-Shack? If so Warrior Jodie is our resident expert and we will verily offer her up as a blood-sacrifice to the nife [sic] wielding appariton, Summer.
Brother Bear said
Will you be accepting PayPal? Or are we still boycotting E-Bay for being loaded with Gay Homosexual listings?
YIC
-bb
SSF said
Looks like paid memberships has died
June Gordon said
Some of the gals down at the Long Branch done started a new “Turning Tricks for Jesus” thing to raise money for folks that done have no money to join.
Let that be a durn example to you selfish so and sos that only think bout YOU SELF and never left a finger or anything to help them that is in need!!!!!
William the Evil American of Scottish ancestry K said
Do they have a website June, I would be very interested in Donating to their cause to help people get memberships so I can enlighten them
TES
William
Michael said
You’re all a bunch of stupid, God Bothering muppets, with nothing
better to do than masturbate over your whithered Bibles
Thanks for the laugh
Warrior Jodie said
MICHAEL You can kiss my lily white ass if you dont like it here. This is a place for CHRISTIANS and CONSERVATIVES and you aint NEITHER.
William the Evil American of Scottish ancestry K said
Michael trust me if Jodie offered for you to kiss her “lily white ass” do it. She has an ass to die for….in other words you would want to bite that, develop lockjaw, and be dragged to death!!!!!!!
besides I haven’t masturbated over a bible in a while…..I am a deist remember?!?!?!?
TES
William
searcher said
i see what you are all up to…all republican cristains are infact MONEY HUNGRY WOLVES..
thats the spirit !!!!! djeez what prices….mental if u pay
still want anwers…here r the questions
1 god created heaven and earth, and all the creatures on it – so where did the Dinosaurs come from?
2 Further, god created adam and eve(after casting lillith, adam’s first wife out of eden), who begat cain and abel. after cain slew abel, god cast him to the land of nod, where he met, married and did a whole raft of begatting over nearly 200 years – where the fuck did rachel come from? god did not create her, and adam and eve only had 2 sons
3 in the same bible in the story of jesus the carpenter, he goes from 18 straight to 30 without passing 19-29, WTF is that all about? where did those years go and what did he do?
searcher said
blasphemy blasphemy blasphemy.
the membership…. not gold (expencive….lol who wanna pay that? )
but 1 of them is saying this… :
“REPUBLICAN FAITH GENERAL*Advance your chances for ETERNAL SALVATION by seeking certification as a RF RECOGNIZED CHRISTIAN through REPUBLICAN FAITH”
did the maker of the page strike a deal with THE Maker (God) ????
can he show us in writing his signature ??? cause i smell a big fat LIE !!!!
who are you to pretend to give extra chances of eternal salvation ???
blasphemy , that is blasphemy , and beyond blasphemy
Searchers boyfiend said
Hey all!
Lovely site you’ve got!
Just a couple of things; I’d love to see you open up to people who don’t believe in God or any other religion. The thing you want is respect for your believes, but respect can only be obtained if you return the favor. Look at it this way; if you explain in proper language and not in those foul words (Cristian right??) someone might actually answer in a more well-behaved manor, thus creating a multi-layered and healthy discussion on which both ends get to do their say! (Think the sentence’s too long for you to comprehend, but try harder!!)
Later, hope things will resolve in a better way.
P.S. If any of you American people need a lesson on how to speak proper American/English let me know, you make me feel ashamed to speak the same language)
Anonymous
(!owned)
bobsmith said
Thank you so much for this site. I’ve never laughed so hard in my life. Please keep this site going. It’s 1000 times better than “The Onion”.
Keep up the great writing.
saikke bentjies said
This can’t be serious….It’s either a really crafty parody or the most narrow minded, bigoted crap I’ve ever seen. I’m pro-heterosexual marriage, but if this is serious it is an embarrassment to Christ followers worldwide.
Brother Thomas said
I would be glad to pay to be part of this anointed work of God! At the moment all my money is tied up in a business deal with a brother from Nigeria.As soon as I receive the money into my bank account I will go for REPUBLICAN FAITH GOLD!
Won’t be long now, after all if you can’t trust a Brother in Christ, who can you trust?
Master Of Puppets said
Leave it to a bunch of uneducated brainwashed sheep to pay that much money for membership to this joke of a website. What a buch of moron’s.
Blackpete said
Sounds like a good scam…..how do I get in on it?
Proud Libertarian said
Praise the Lord, pass the plate
Proud Libertarian said
MODERATOR’S NOTE: I have deleted your rude post, you crazy Hawaiian trash. You are a very angry person, clearly mentally unbalanced and probably married to a leper or an oriental. You need to get down on your knees and BEG for forgiveness from your Savior. My forgiveness will be a little harder to get.
Proud (not pseudo) Libertarian said
Oh, damn, so you were serious about that $600.
Satan said
Hey what’s up anonymous, I see you are doing your master proud tonight. Keep up the good work and drive this wretched wench into my fiery clutches. I’ll be seeing you all…real soon.
-Lucifer
[Moderator's note: We have confirmed that the real Satan did not leave this post. Rather, the post is from a very insecure, emasculated, Satan wannabe.]
Jesus H. Christ said
Please Anon, don’t listen to Satan. He lies and he wants you to harm this poor christian woman’s website so he can take all of your souls to hell. I sense goodness in Anon tonight and know that you can avoid temptation. So I beg you to walk away from your computer, turn on Fox News(Bill O’Reilly makes me lol) and then write a letter to your congressman telling him to pass that abortion ban. I know you don’t want to do this Anon.
-Jesus
[Moderator's note: This is not Jesus of Nazareth, the King of Kings, posting. From the IP address, we have determined that this post comes from the computer of the assistant gardender of one of our prominent posters. The gardener's name is pronounced "Hay-soos" and the man is in this country illegally.]
bwaha said
where is http://baptistsforbrown2009.com?
also, I think you are fake Christians, cuz you don’t have a link to conservapedia!!
blueollie said
41: If you are going to post here, please use proper English and proper punctuation.
I can't believe it said
[Moderator's note: This message has been deleted due to your use of multiple names. How many times do we have to say that each person is allowed only one name? You have already posted as "Negro Rocketeer." I know you people are slow, but please try to get it through your thick skull that such is the only name you may use.]
RobertKoolaid said
3:6 “And we utterly destroyed them … utterly destroying the men, women, and children, of every city.”
I can’t wait to take back our country, ya’ll!
It’s gonna be a cold day in hell when they pry my cold dead hands from my babies foreskin off for his mandatory “Kenyan Style” circumcision.
I done herd about them fraternity treatments that limit the endocrine disrupters of white Christian mens so that other illegals can keep
having welfare babies for Pelosi and Reid. Rusty Humphries is telling the TRUTH to the EVIL Husseini and his criminal thug possie.
I’m armed, but I ain’t goin’ nowheres today.
Love, IN Jesus Name!
RobertKoolaid